When you start a new relationship you might decide that you would like the relationship to be sexual

Talk about consent with your partner

Whatever you are ready for, this might be different to what your partner is ready for and you should never assume they are at the same stage as you. For example you might be ready for your partner to see you naked and to touch one another, but they may be comfortable with touching with clothes on instead.

Talking to your partner about what they are comfortable with happening and sharing what you wish to happen allows you both to be aware of the boundaries around your physical interactions. It enables you to get their consent before doing anything, which is an essential part of a relationship and also to share your consent with them, which is equally important.

When having sex, consent is an agreement between both partners that they definitely want to have sex, or do any sexual act. Both partners need to fully and clearly agree to it, and it must be continuous for the duration of sex. That means that either partner has the right to change their mind at any time.

Consent is needed every time you want to do any sexual act with someone and just because you or your partner may have agreed previously, that does not mean you have to agree again. When having sex no one should feel under pressure to do anything they don’t want to and it is important to recognise that with your partner.

Openly talking https://lovingwomen.org/no/blog/kvinner-som-leter-etter-ekteskap/ to your partner about consent can help to build a relationship of mutual trust and respect and create an intimate relationship that works for you both. Read our article on consent and find out about making it an essential part of your relationships.

Spend time apart from your partner

Spending time with someone when you first start seeing them can be amazing and whether it is in person or online it may be all that you want to do. Having someone show interest in you can feel great but if they want to spend all their time with you, or expect to be able to contact you at all times this can be a warning sign that they may be controlling or too dependent on you. Having space from one another and enjoying time apart, both in person and online, is a healthy part of any relationship and establishing this as a boundary at the beginning can help to strengthen positive relationships. If someone is not willing to maintain these boundaries, they may not be emotionally prepared to be in a relationship.

Listen to one another

Being able to listen to someone when they speak and take on board what they are saying can make a big difference in relationships. Sometimes it can be easy to butt in when someone is speaking if you don’t agree with what they are saying or feel you have good advice to give. However, making an active effort to listen to someone while they speak can help develop positive communication skills in a relationship and in doing so help to prevent arguments. Read our article on how to be a good listener to learn more about active listening and how to put it into practice.

Be able to apologise

Being able to recognise when you are in the wrong and apologise is a great skill to have and it can help to strengthen relationships. Whether you meant to hurt someone or not, apologising is a way to show another person that you understand that you did do something hurtful. Whatever has happened, being able to say you’re sorry gives both of you a chance to let go of any resentment or negative feelings and move on.